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My Journey to Motherhood: Motherhood is a Blessing Not a Guarantee Part II

9/13/2015

1 Comment

 
After leaving my appointment, I still had no idea about the severity of my condition, and it didn't help that reading an X-ray is nearly impossible for someone who is not in the medical field. I knew it was something that had to be addressed but I figured it had to be something a pill or two could fix. I didn't bother Googling it because honestly sometimes the "answers" you find create more anxiety than actual value. I scheduled an appointment with my gynecologist and her demeanor was more calm than the PA and more of what I expected. She informed me that I needed to see a fertility specialist immediately because it was something that would definitely prevent me from getting pregnant. 

Learning that Surgery was the Only Viable Option

My husband and I walked into our first appointment at the reproductive facility and it was packed. There were some older women but surprisingly it was more women in my age group. They filled the seats wearing somber faces. The atmosphere was engulfed with anxiety and a feeling of depression. I knew all of the women were dealing with infertility in some form although I didn't know their individual stories. After checking in we took our seats and waited before being called back. As I was sitting there I began to look around the room. So many of these women looked like me. Some dressed professionally because they were squeezing their appointments in before work, others dressed casually accompanied by their husbands or significant others. How could this be? So many women who were still young and hadn't reached that infamous 35 mark who were struggling just like me. I realized this is not a woman over 35 issue and that the age of fertility difficulty was decreasing right before our eyes.

I was referred to the only female doctor at the office. I was shocked that she was the only woman. It was such a sensitive subject and honestly only a feeling that women can truly understand. So why was she the only one? I considered it to be a blessing that I was paired with her. We finally met with her and she was by far the most upbeat physician I had ever met. She had a very positive attitude and was very encouraging. She reviewed my chart, X-rays and blood work and what she said next was the game changer.

She explained that somehow I had scar tissue throughout my abdomen and that one of my Fallopian tubes was dilated and blocked and the other was blocked by scar tissue. How is this even possible? I was so healthy. I never had issues in the past and I was faithful with my annual appointments.


She told me I had one viable choice, I had to have surgery. I couldn't get pregnant naturally, and artificial insemination (AI) and in vitro fertilization (IVF) wouldn't be successful if I didn't fix my dilated fallopian tube.  I discussed it with my husband and his reaction was of pure concern. He never wanted to see me hurting or in pain, and the look on his face was breaking my heart. I didn't want to disappoint him because I knew how much he was looking forward to one day becoming a father. I didn't know how I felt about my options but I did know that my faith in God was strong and I was willing to do what I needed to, not just for fertility purposes but for my overall health.

To be continued...

Forever Fierce Fabulous & Flawless

Tenisha


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1 Comment
Jurena Jackson
9/14/2015 10:00:25 am

You will be in my prayers. Surgery can be a scary thing, but you can do it. No matter what you decide your decision will allow you to witness for others and to help them through their journey. Surgery, adoption, surrogate, or all of the above. There are many factors for you to consider, but none of them alone. HUGS.

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    Tenisha Patterson Brown, Esq. - Attorney, Business Manager for Professional Athletes, Entrepreneur, Philanthropist, Seminole & Mother to 3 Rambunctious Dogs 

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